The following is a rejection I received recently. Aside from the typical lack of details, this rejection bothers me because I really thought the story is what the editor was looking for, but clearly not.
Dear Alex Azar,
Thank you for sending us "Remember Me". We appreciate the chance to read it. Unfortunately, the piece is not for us.
Thanks again. Best of luck with this.
Sincerely,
S**** M*K*****
PHP
Notice the plug and play rejection. I understand these editors have many stories to cycle through, but a little personalization would be appreciated. In any case, look forward to reading this story on the blog in the coming days.
Following the journey of award winning author, Alex Azar, as he travels the publishing world and all things interesting. To reproduce or publish any material found within this blog, please contact me at azarrising@hotmail.com
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
Blackbeard
The following is a very brief exaggerated non-fiction telling of the origin of Blackbeard, that I wrote a number of years ago.
“Edward, please, I’m begging you don’t go on this fool’s errand for a power mad Queen.” Maria beseeched her newlywed husband, and soon to be father of her unborn child. She had made her away to his bed, kneeling by his side, her hands clasping his.
Edward had enlisted in the ‘War of the Spanish Succession’ in order to be able to afford his forthcoming child and the expenses that come with a baby, while hoping to not have to rely on Maria’s Father’s wealth, which seemed perfectly reasonable to her. “I don’t care if you’ve enlisted, you could go by my family’s name, ‘Edward Drummond’ oh my father would just love it, and you’d truly be the son he never had. Besides, you’ll miss our child’s birth. If you’re gone for years, how will our child ever know who you are?”
Not seeing the severity of the situation that his wife does, Edward replies in his typical jovial manner, “If our child will not know who I am, I shall grow my beard for the days that I am gone, so upon my return you shall not know me either. Besides, I like my name, Edward Teach, is who I am. My father was a teacher of ship builders, as was his father before him. I need to do this not only for you and our child, but for those who came before me.” Now risen out of bed, unable to sleep due to concerns of what the following morrow will bring. Well, that and his wife’s incessant nagging.
Edward retires himself to his study, and spends the better part of the evening studying his father’s writings, trying to prepare himself for the tribulations he knows await him. Edward falls asleep amidst the wise words of his father, and his grand father, yet his dreams are filled with the life he will miss of his child, and wife.
The following morning, Edward woke with doubts of his decision for the first time since he enlisted, and a horrible kink in his neck, for the countless time since moving into this house. This house, one of the most spectacular in all of Bristol; this house, which Maria’s father bought for them as a wedding gift. This house, whose every servant was a former helper of the House of Drummond. This house, where his son or daughter will be treated like royalty, by a staff and family, seemingly hand, picked by the great Mr. Drummond. This house, where his child will grow up with everything he will ever need, provided by his grandfather, not his father.
Seeing Maria still asleep with the early hints of dawn sprawling across her in bed, Edward decides right there and then, that whether he will be by his child through every waking hour or not, he will be the provider, not his money green grandfather.
Resolved to go through with this, Edward kisses Maria on the forehead, and is off before she wakes up. Shortly after Edward takes his leave, it begins to rain, not a drizzle, not a shower, but a down pour the likes of which the simple people of Bristol have never seen. Edward, however, doesn’t see it as rain, no, not rain, but the angels crying in unison of what the fates have in store him, for Edward knows, he is walking away from that house for the last time, never to see his beautiful wife Maria again, nor ever lay eyes, on his child. But in the presence of Heaven’s minstrel, and attendance of all those he once called brother, neighbor, or friend, Edward promises, nay, he vows, that with each passing year his love and thoughts of his child will grow, as will his inheritance. Edward decrees, before the eye of God hidden in the sun, that while his child may not know his father, his child will never want. And not for the sake of his father-in-law, but because Edward will do right by him.
Rising from his sopping knees, Edward finishes his route to board his assigned vessel, where he meets Captain Benjamin Hornigold. They become fast friends, and Edward quickly rises through the ranks to become Hornigold’s first mate. All the while never forgetting his vows to God and the heavens, his child, now nearing the age of four, and his dear Maria, who he prays is happy despite his absence. He has worked as hard as any man ever to board a ship, whether it be a war vessel, leisure cruiser, or a pirate ship, amassing a sizable fortune and bestowing it to his child, who he doesn’t even know if it’s a girl or a boy. He has built a reputation all men aboard the ship have come to respect, and not a day since his departure, has he shaven a whisker from his face.
However, the years have taken their toll on kind Edward. After Britain withdrew from the Queen Anne’s War, Edward was without direction. Following in his only friend’s footstep, he joined Benjamin in their new endeavor, piracy. The long years of violence, and a lifetime away from any family left Edward a heartless shell of the beautiful creature he once was. His sour disposition coupled with his unkempt facial hair earned him the infamous title… Blackbeard.
“Edward, please, I’m begging you don’t go on this fool’s errand for a power mad Queen.” Maria beseeched her newlywed husband, and soon to be father of her unborn child. She had made her away to his bed, kneeling by his side, her hands clasping his.
Edward had enlisted in the ‘War of the Spanish Succession’ in order to be able to afford his forthcoming child and the expenses that come with a baby, while hoping to not have to rely on Maria’s Father’s wealth, which seemed perfectly reasonable to her. “I don’t care if you’ve enlisted, you could go by my family’s name, ‘Edward Drummond’ oh my father would just love it, and you’d truly be the son he never had. Besides, you’ll miss our child’s birth. If you’re gone for years, how will our child ever know who you are?”
Not seeing the severity of the situation that his wife does, Edward replies in his typical jovial manner, “If our child will not know who I am, I shall grow my beard for the days that I am gone, so upon my return you shall not know me either. Besides, I like my name, Edward Teach, is who I am. My father was a teacher of ship builders, as was his father before him. I need to do this not only for you and our child, but for those who came before me.” Now risen out of bed, unable to sleep due to concerns of what the following morrow will bring. Well, that and his wife’s incessant nagging.
Edward retires himself to his study, and spends the better part of the evening studying his father’s writings, trying to prepare himself for the tribulations he knows await him. Edward falls asleep amidst the wise words of his father, and his grand father, yet his dreams are filled with the life he will miss of his child, and wife.
The following morning, Edward woke with doubts of his decision for the first time since he enlisted, and a horrible kink in his neck, for the countless time since moving into this house. This house, one of the most spectacular in all of Bristol; this house, which Maria’s father bought for them as a wedding gift. This house, whose every servant was a former helper of the House of Drummond. This house, where his son or daughter will be treated like royalty, by a staff and family, seemingly hand, picked by the great Mr. Drummond. This house, where his child will grow up with everything he will ever need, provided by his grandfather, not his father.
Seeing Maria still asleep with the early hints of dawn sprawling across her in bed, Edward decides right there and then, that whether he will be by his child through every waking hour or not, he will be the provider, not his money green grandfather.
Resolved to go through with this, Edward kisses Maria on the forehead, and is off before she wakes up. Shortly after Edward takes his leave, it begins to rain, not a drizzle, not a shower, but a down pour the likes of which the simple people of Bristol have never seen. Edward, however, doesn’t see it as rain, no, not rain, but the angels crying in unison of what the fates have in store him, for Edward knows, he is walking away from that house for the last time, never to see his beautiful wife Maria again, nor ever lay eyes, on his child. But in the presence of Heaven’s minstrel, and attendance of all those he once called brother, neighbor, or friend, Edward promises, nay, he vows, that with each passing year his love and thoughts of his child will grow, as will his inheritance. Edward decrees, before the eye of God hidden in the sun, that while his child may not know his father, his child will never want. And not for the sake of his father-in-law, but because Edward will do right by him.
Rising from his sopping knees, Edward finishes his route to board his assigned vessel, where he meets Captain Benjamin Hornigold. They become fast friends, and Edward quickly rises through the ranks to become Hornigold’s first mate. All the while never forgetting his vows to God and the heavens, his child, now nearing the age of four, and his dear Maria, who he prays is happy despite his absence. He has worked as hard as any man ever to board a ship, whether it be a war vessel, leisure cruiser, or a pirate ship, amassing a sizable fortune and bestowing it to his child, who he doesn’t even know if it’s a girl or a boy. He has built a reputation all men aboard the ship have come to respect, and not a day since his departure, has he shaven a whisker from his face.
However, the years have taken their toll on kind Edward. After Britain withdrew from the Queen Anne’s War, Edward was without direction. Following in his only friend’s footstep, he joined Benjamin in their new endeavor, piracy. The long years of violence, and a lifetime away from any family left Edward a heartless shell of the beautiful creature he once was. His sour disposition coupled with his unkempt facial hair earned him the infamous title… Blackbeard.
Friday, July 8, 2011
Lucy Liu in the Non sexy dream
This is a dream I had last night. Enjoy it more than I did.
The dream begins with me getting off a personal rocket, that's only slightly bigger than an adult like a personal sub. I'm holding a large golf club and am almost immediately greeted by my wife, the a fore mentioned Lucy Liu, who is also wielding a golf club and exited her own rocket.
We're in a park that in real life I used to live across in Little Ferry, the town-wide famous Tire-Park, and we're in the midst of a game of Interstate-Golf. And as is the nature of dreams I instinctively knew all the rules of the game. There's a designated course in each state, and in each course there is a "drive zone". Each player has three puts to get their ball to the drive zone and then from there one drive to hit the ball into the next state's course (remember this is a dream).
Continuing with the dream, once I realize where we are, Lucy and I begin reminiscing of our high school days, and in particular how if I hadn't broken up with her friend (a real life ex that will remain nameless) we would never have gotten together.
Lucy says "The only reason why (unnamed ex) cheated on you with that guy, is because she wanted to have a threesome with you two."
I put my ball halfway to the drive zone, and question, "But she had to know I'd never go for that."
"Well she didn't but I did, and that's why I encouraged her to do it, so we could be together." She responds before putting her ball into drive zone in a single shot. Having taken the lead she gives me a sly smirk and I wake up just as she's going to kiss me.
Recalling the dream, I became frustrated with the movie Inception thinking that I should have known it was a dream since I was with Lucy Liu, but then again I didn't get any so...
The dream begins with me getting off a personal rocket, that's only slightly bigger than an adult like a personal sub. I'm holding a large golf club and am almost immediately greeted by my wife, the a fore mentioned Lucy Liu, who is also wielding a golf club and exited her own rocket.
We're in a park that in real life I used to live across in Little Ferry, the town-wide famous Tire-Park, and we're in the midst of a game of Interstate-Golf. And as is the nature of dreams I instinctively knew all the rules of the game. There's a designated course in each state, and in each course there is a "drive zone". Each player has three puts to get their ball to the drive zone and then from there one drive to hit the ball into the next state's course (remember this is a dream).
Continuing with the dream, once I realize where we are, Lucy and I begin reminiscing of our high school days, and in particular how if I hadn't broken up with her friend (a real life ex that will remain nameless) we would never have gotten together.
Lucy says "The only reason why (unnamed ex) cheated on you with that guy, is because she wanted to have a threesome with you two."
I put my ball halfway to the drive zone, and question, "But she had to know I'd never go for that."
"Well she didn't but I did, and that's why I encouraged her to do it, so we could be together." She responds before putting her ball into drive zone in a single shot. Having taken the lead she gives me a sly smirk and I wake up just as she's going to kiss me.
Recalling the dream, I became frustrated with the movie Inception thinking that I should have known it was a dream since I was with Lucy Liu, but then again I didn't get any so...
Monday, June 27, 2011
Rejection 10: Breaking From The Pack
Dear Alex,
Thank you for your submission and I apologize for the delay in my response. After careful consideration, I have decided to pass on "Breaking from the Pack." I liked the concept behind the story, but I had trouble connecting with your protagonist, the detective.
Sincerely,
J****
What I find interesting about this rejection is that Breaking from the Pack is a first person story and I find it very hard to have "trouble connecting" with the main character, especially since I feel this particular story has many personal moments for the detective/ He discusses his dead wife and daughter, and how their deaths affected his outlook on the Christmas season. Regardless, of the editor's reasons for rejecting the story, I feel that this particular publishing company, just does not like my writing. I've submitted many things to them, some of which have later been accepted for publication, so I'll continue to hold the stance that this particular publisher just doesn't like me. On a brighter note, this particular story should see the ink of page very soon! More to come...
Thank you for your submission and I apologize for the delay in my response. After careful consideration, I have decided to pass on "Breaking from the Pack." I liked the concept behind the story, but I had trouble connecting with your protagonist, the detective.
Sincerely,
J****
What I find interesting about this rejection is that Breaking from the Pack is a first person story and I find it very hard to have "trouble connecting" with the main character, especially since I feel this particular story has many personal moments for the detective/ He discusses his dead wife and daughter, and how their deaths affected his outlook on the Christmas season. Regardless, of the editor's reasons for rejecting the story, I feel that this particular publishing company, just does not like my writing. I've submitted many things to them, some of which have later been accepted for publication, so I'll continue to hold the stance that this particular publisher just doesn't like me. On a brighter note, this particular story should see the ink of page very soon! More to come...
Monday, June 6, 2011
Heaven Sent
Heaven Sent
Alex Azar
“Push! Come on Martha, one more push. The Baby’s crowning!” Dr. Lee instructs from the foot of the bed. “Come on, one…two…PUSH!” For a moment all that’s heard is the wailing of the newborn. “Congratulations Mr. Furr, you’re the father of a beautiful healthy baby boy.”
With a smile on his face Luscious calmly replies to the doctor, “Thank you doctor, but I think Martha’d prefer to hold it, I need some air.”
“Our son’s name is Gabriel; that was your choice so please don’t call our son ‘it.’” Martha says scolding Luscious, but he was already out the door.
As Luscious walks down the hallway of the hospital, he can hear his perfectly healthy son crying in his mother’s arms. Halfway down the hall Luscious stops and turns back to face the room, “Don’t forget son, I have plans for you.” And with that he puts on his black pinstriped derby hat and turns again, instantly Gabriel stops crying and dies in Martha’s arms. Luscious resumes his walk and unnoticed by anyone a slight knowing smile sprawls across his face matching perfectly to his finely tailored black and red suit, humming a quiet tune.
Martha’s cry can be heard well outside the hospital, over the sirens, over the car horns, over all other noises. Then all at once the cries, the sirens and horns, and all noise cease.
ŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦ
In an intense white flash of light Gabriel wakens in front of small polished wooden gates with no definable markings. “Hello Gabriel, I am Peter and this…” the man steps aside and opens the gates with a wave of the hand, “… is Heaven.”
Confused Gabriel gets to his feet and for the first time notices his body, and now he’s even more confused, “But I’m just a baby, right?”
Peter explains, “Yes you did pass away as a child, and now you are at the peak of physical ability as are all who are in Heaven. Do you think you’d be expected to spend eternity as a baby? You are in Heaven; you’ll never age or become ill.”
Still confused Gabriel asks, “Where is Heaven, WHAT is Heaven?”
“Forgive me; I understand you died as a baby before you could comprehend these concepts. Give it time, your mind has the capacity to understand all things, and there are certain notions and emotions instilled in everyone before birth. The rest you’ll learn while here. Trust me, you have time to learn.”
With that Gabriel floats through the gateway and is immediately comforted by the countless others he just joined. Completely carefree, Gabriel’s mind is absorbing everything he’s taking in and the longer he stays the more at home he feels. For what would have been over a decade on Earth, Gabriel nonchalantly spends his time mingling with everyone in Heaven, but mostly those he’s learned to have been in Heaven longer than he. Throughout it all he hasn’t a single care or concern, except his father.
With no sense of time in Heaven, Gabriel has no idea of the time passed on Earth. The entire time, he keeps in his mind that his father has a plan for him. Focusing on that Gabriel speaks to an angel that is said to have been there from the beginning. “John, do you know who my father is?”
With a voice that can sooth the wild out of a boar John replies, “Of course I do child, your father is the same as mine, the same as all of us here in Heaven, he is God the all father.”
“But what of my Earth father? He has a plan for me.”
“The only plan that matters is the Lord’s plan, and of your ‘father’ on Earth, he is not your father. As I said God is your father. The bearer of flesh means nothing to the creator of all life.” Placing a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder, “You’ll learn this soon; here you have nothing but the chance to learn.” Nodding with a smile Gabriel walks away, but he still isn’t satisfied.
Returning to some of the friends he has made, a group of angels who all died as children, some older than others. Speaking to a child who died at the age of 10, “Hasar, everyone says children and good people come here, right? Well, where do bad people go?”
Having died long before Gabriel, Hasar has accumulated a vast amount of information, and is always glad to relay it. “All bad souls go to the land of the fallen one, where everything goes wrong and no one is happy.”
“The fallen one? Who is that?”
“He was the greatest of all angels, but rebelled against God, leading other angels to their doom. His name was Lucifer.”
The sound of that name cracks open a barrier of thought overtaking Gabriel’s mind, Lucifer? Lucifer? Luscifer? Luscifur? Luscisfur? LUSCIOUS FURR! With that the floodgates of his mind explode with memories he never knew he had, rewriting his life. A father he couldn’t remember re-enters his life giving a new meaning to his afterlife. The plan he never knew becomes the destiny he is to fulfill. And for what seems like decades, Gabriel prepares for the inevitable.
ŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦŦ
A lifetime after being abandoned by her husband and losing her only child on the same day, Martha dies alone in an alley with a needle in her arm. At the time of his mother’s death, Gabriel embraces his new life with a new family, a family of angels influenced by a cunning he inherited from his father.
“Brahman, you lived your life as a Buddhist yet instead of achieving Nirvana, here you are in Heaven. This ‘god’ commanded his people to live a certain life style filled with prayer and ceremonies, but here we are among Muslims, Buddhists, Jews, even agnostics and atheists. Where is the importance of our lives, if we all arrive here governed by someone we didn’t believe in?” Every word that leaves Gabriel’s mouth adds another seed of doubt in the mind of the recent arrival.
Trying to present a valid rebuttal, Brahman clings to all he can, “God doesn’t govern, everyone here is equal and free to do as he pleases.”
Truly furious Gabriel responds, “Equal! Are you equal to Peter, or the powerful Michael, or better yet, my namesake, Gabriel? Free as we please! Are you truly free, are you free to leave?”
“You’re named after the Archangel Gabriel and here you are trying to convince me to revolt?”
“The ‘Messenger of good news,’ yes my father has an interesting sense of humor. However, if ‘trying’ is all I’m doing perhaps I was wrong in thinking you were worthy of being saved.” With his last con in play Gabriel turns to leave.
“Wait,” Brahman bites the bait, to the delight of Gabriel, “What do you mean saved? Saved from who, from what?”
“Despite what you naively think, we here are not equal. During the battle of Armageddon we will be nothing more than canon fodder. A distraction to be used by the higher angels in which we’ll be sacrificed for the ‘greater good.’”
“And what do you propose?”
“Join me, help me overthrow this righteous hierarchy and we twelve will have our thrones in the kingdom to follow.”
“How do you know this? How do you know what no others know?”
“I know much, for I was chosen, but if you still doubt, I shall find another to be saved.” And with that the 12th disciple of Lucifer was converted, slating an attack on the unprepared angels in Heaven.
Sometime later the 12 unholy disciples of Lucifer gather, where Gabriel dictates the coming war plans like a seasoned general. “Listen up every one, there’s no way the twelve of us are prepared or capable of completing the task at hand.”
“But I thought you said we were done recruiting Gabriel?” asks one of the disciples.
“We? What is this we? I finished recruiting but if you interrupt me again ‘we’ll’ have to find one more. As I was saying, we can’t do this alone. So our first order of business is to eliminate Emmanuelle and take her sword. With her sword we will be able to open a rift that leads to Hell where my father will be waiting with his legion of minions ready to over throw Heaven and this hypocritical hierarchy which has stood too long unchallenged, when finally I… we twelve will be able to take our rightful places in the coming kingdom. However, Emmanuelle is constantly surrounded by several powerful ‘friends’ and getting to her will be the more difficult of our tasks. That is what will require our greater numbers. We will deal with each of the three angels she will be with, with a 3-1 ratio. The strongest of the one we’ll need to deal with is Abdiel, he is perfect even among angels and was responsible for thwarting my father and his resulting banishment to that boiling inferno he’s been damned to since. The other two will be much easier to eliminate, Ammiel who basically observes the sins of humans on Earth, and Rumael, who’s nothing more than a traitorous peon who was with my father in the great rebellion, but he atoned for his sins and still resides in Paradise. I want John, Brahman, and Robert taking out Abdiel first and fast. Yoon, Mathew, and T’Chakal eliminate Ammiel while Paul, Chris, and Kl… Klie... I’m sorry I still can’t pronounce your name.”
“Kliekle”
“Yea, you three are going to deal with Rumael, and be sure he suffers. Meanwhile Mark and Anthony will attend to Emmanuelle and open the window to Hell.” Gabriel, happy with the future event he knows will so perfectly unfold, relaxes in his chair to revel in the moment for a while longer.
“And what will you be doing in the mean time?” Mathew nervously asks.
“Me? I have a theory to test.” With that Gabriel waves them off, to rest for the following night as he smiles in anticipation.
Interestingly enough, there is no following night, nor any previous night, no night at all in a kingdom of eternal light. The notion of night is another thing implanted into Gabriel’s mind from his father. None-the-less, the time arrives and John, Brahman, and Robert, lead the front followed by the rest with Gabriel following behind donning his father’s lost armor.
They approach nonchalantly enough, according to plan, and only steps away they break formation, as it were, and all attack their respective targets. Seeing John, Brahman, and Robert struggle with Abdiel, like a good general, Gabriel turns back and gives his men an unexpected hand, surprising the angel allowing the three to overpower him. Happy with his soldiers’ progress Gabriel leaves for his own mission.
After their leader’s assistance, the three point men were able to deal with Abdiel with little struggle. Same goes for the rest of the crew with their respective angels. Mark and Anthony easily dispose of the distracted Emmanuelle who was more concerned for her friends’ well being than her own. After some bumbling and windows to undesired destinations, they succeeded in opening a pathway to Lucifer and his waiting legion of demons and monsters.
In the meantime, Gabriel peaks his head past a small wooden door, “So I was right, your own arrogance leaves you unprotected, oh great one. The mighty Lord sits before me on a raggedy bench, no doubt crafted from the skills inherited from your earthly father. Your time is nigh, for you left your enemies unchecked. Or does one such as you consider yourself above having enemies? Answer me! Very well I should wait for MY father but your death is a pleasure I’ll like to see fulfilled first hand. Hmm? I wonder what happens to ‘God’ when he dies. Any last words?… Damn You Acknowledge Me! Bow before he who will succeed where his father failed. BOW Before Me!”
Gabriel charges in anger, flaming sword in hand. A tear rolls down His face just before He hangs His head in shame. Seconds before Gabriel can attack, a blindingly familiar light flashes, and Gabriel witnesses decades upon decades go by, backwards, and he awakens as a whelping babe in his mother’s arms moments after being born.
Outside of the hospital room the proud father stops his walk, a small triangularly tipped tail peaks below the pant leg of his tailored suit, he tips his hat heavenward, “Just keeping you on your toes old friend, just keeping you on your toes.” Luscious Furr resumes his walk, whistling, “You’re the Devil in Disguise.”
Done
Alex Azar
Let me begin by saying that I wrote this story nearly 15 years ago. At the time I recently read the bible and one thing that stuck out to me was that because God loves all kids they, like all dogs, go to Heaven. I began wondering what if one of these kids that was blindly brought to Heaven was corrupted, and from that sprung the story you read.
On a side note, I'm not really an Elvis Presly fan, but I do really like "Devil in Disguise" and felt it more than fiting for the context of the story.
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